five for friday

(follow along on Instagram @themarygraham)

Slow week on Instagram for me. When I'm stressed, social media use goes way down. Anyone else the same way?

1. Outfit of the day: still loving the striped skirts I picked up from Old Navy a while ago. I wish I would have gotten the smaller size though (tough problem to have, huh?). I was between two sizes and thought it would shrink when I washed it so I went with the bigger one. I was wrong...

2. Harper Kimery has to grow up to work in showbiz. While it's not what I would hope for her, she was born to entertain.

3. Saturday night was Cards Against Humanity and drinks with friends. It was a very good night. And I got to sleep in the next morning UNTIL TEN O'CLOCK. It has been years since that has happened. I forgot how good it felt.

4. A friend's daughter turned one last weekend and we attended a pretty awesome circus-themed outdoor party. The girls were in heaven and it wore them out. Those are marks of a highly successful kids' party.

5. Not to rub it in, but by complete accident, Chris and I had date night Friday night and Saturday night last weekend. Friday night we got to spend the evening wandering around historic Fountain Square with old friends, have dinner, a couple band reunions (long live This Beautiful Day and Same As Sunday!), and then watch a friend's new band perform. Although in all honesty, I crapped out at 10:00 and got a ride home with a friend. Mama can't make it to midnight with all the cool kids. I'm old.

How was your week? I'm ready for a night at home and in my pajamas by 5:30. And I'm not afraid to say it! Have a great weekend!


Linking up with Lauren Elizabeth for High Five for Friday.

three dolla holla + national mom's nite out

(dress: thrifted, belt: Kohls, necklace: Forever 21, wedges: JC Penny)

[Random thoughts: I realize this is my second navy outfit post today. Apparently, I'm on a classic navy kick. Also, I got this dress for THREE DOLLARS at the thrift shop. It's like vintage, union-approved factory made and everything. Probably my most proud thrifting moment to date. And props to Kaitlyn Meeks for spying it in the Treasure Room.]

Did you know that tonight is National Mom's Nite Out? Nationwide, moms are being celebrated and pampered. Today is a great day to be a mom, I'm just sayin'.  And mostly I'm sayin' that because some days it's not too great being a mom. And that's the truth.

If you're local to Indy, I know that the area Simon Malls are holding some pretty sweet events that you could attend with your girlfriends. It's not too late to call the babysitter or tell your significant other to pick up a pizza because you've got plans with the girls. (I know that is easier said than done, but for just tonight, make it happen!!).

I was lucky enough to be invited to attend a Mom's Nite Out event sponsored by Restaurant.com and put together by theCityMoms and Indy with Kids at Sushi on the Rocks---there's going to be a fashion show, shopping, giveaways, and, the best part, sushi! I might have picked up a new dress and shoes for the occasion. If you follow me on Twitter or Instagram, I'll be pretty active tonight so you can follow along with all the events or, if that's not your thing, just wait patiently for the exciting post next week. (Can't make it out? Follow along here for the video feed of the event and you can still win prizes if you have a Twitter account!)

Either way, if you're a mom, make sure you treat yourself to a little something special tonight. Because you deserve it!

Linking up with Lena B, Actually for A Passion for Fashion.

these keepers of my memories.

(Side note: These are some horrible pictures of me. But I rationalized that they're bad of everyone [sorry friends] so it all evens itself out. Enjoy my embarrassment.)

(Sweatpants to the 5th grade Christmas party? Of course.)

(that hair--it was 1993 and I got a VHS tape for my birthday.)

(to say I was a tomboy would be an understatement...)

Growing up, I could not wait to get out of my small town. It's such a cliche to say, but I couldn't wait to get away from these kids I had known my whole life, the house I had lived in since I was five, and the reality that everyone knew everyone else's business.

All those things drove me absolutely crazy.

It's funny how your perspective changes thirteen years after high school. Because those annoyances are now what I want for my children: a community to grow up in, a house that will always be home no matter where they go, and people, a whole village of people, that know who my children are and care about their well being just as much as I do.

I was lucky enough to go to the same school my whole life. My first best friend in kindergarten was there with me on graduation day. My first slumber party, my first girl/boy party, my first time driving a car without my parents, my first lots of things---I was surrounded by the same group of kids for all of it. My first friends are still my friends twenty five years later.

And recently we got together for a night out---drinks and dinner and stories. Lots and lots of stories.

Of course, as I was nervously heading downtown to meet them a million things were running through my head: do I look older? I drive a minivan now! What if my fly is open? Will we have anything to talk about? What if they bring up David Neilan??!

But there was also this sense of comfort. This knowledge that these girls knew me at my worst (hello, it was the early 90s; also, see pictures above), they knew my family, they cared about me and I cared about them. It's an odd feeling to say you spend 18 years so closely woven together and then not know them like that anymore.

As the night progressed, we caught up with how everyone's parent were (and when did they get so old?), who had kids, who married who, the local New Pal gossip just like we were sixteen again. (Also, we talked about some not teenage things like our favorite Pinterest pins and how to clean a stainless steel sink. Adults are so interesting and fun!)

It was refreshing and relaxing and what I needed.

I would like to think I'm a sophisticated and mature thirty one year old: I'm married with kids, we own a couple houses, and I have a career. But there is part of me that will always, especially with those girls, be a teenager. Always be unsure and so sure, all at the same time. Full of self doubt and completely accepted.

It's been an honor to know these girls for so long. To see who we became, to see who we are still becoming, and to see who we want to become. To laugh louder than anyone at the bar and share stories and drinks and pictures. To rest in our friendship and know that no matter what, someone has our back if we really needed it.

And I'm looking forward to the next twenty five years.

Cheers.

National Infertility Awareness Week + A Royal Daughter guest post

Today I am honored to have the beautiful (inside and out) Amanda from A Royal Daughter visiting. She's sharing some pretty powerful stuff that's on her heart and I know, from experience, that so many people will relate to her and her struggle. Make sure you stop by her blog today and show her some love and encouragement.

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Hi there, have we met before? If not, let me introduce myself:

I am a country-living, ice tea drinking, good book reading, farming, ranching, Jesus-loving, curly-headed wife of a seminary professor.   He's a teacher, I'm a writer. He's a thinker, I'm a creative. Together we make our home on a small farm in Texas.

I had the complete joy and honor of meeting Mary last October at the Influence Conference. She has such a sweet spirit, and I loved having the opportunity to brainstorm with her about her blog design. She's a treasure, and she's graciously offered to let me take over her online space today. Thank you Mary for your virtual - albeit very real - hospitality.

Carly, Mary, Me, and Brittany. Mary's the only non-Texan in the picture. And her fabulously comfy outfit may have inspired me to purchase some mustard pants to pair with a chambray top. Talk about copycat fashion!


I'm here today for a very specific purpose. April 21-27 is National Infertility Awareness Week, and as a woman deep in the thick of battling barrenness, I am trying to make the most of this painful journey by spreading awareness about infertility.

A few facts about infertility:

Approximately 1 in 6 couples in the United States are diagnosed with some degree of infertility each year.

"Infertility" is defined as the inability to conceive a child after one year of unprotected, well-timed intercourse for women under the age of 35. Women 35 and older may be diagnosed after 6 months of unprotected, well-timed intercourse without conception. (The inability to sustain a pregnancy beyond 20 weeks is also classified as "infertility.")

30% of infertility is the result of an ovulatatory dysfunction (i.e. there is a problem with the woman's ovulation cycle).

30% of infertility is the result of a problem with the man (i.e. sperm structure or production).

Women who face infertility often describe their situation as "lonely," "isolating," and "painful."

There is a large spectrum of treatments for infertility, with varying degrees of invasiveness and cost.

My story:

My husband and I started trying for a baby almost 4 years.

We were officially diagnosed with "unexplained infertility" in February 2012 (the same month our foster boys were removed from our home). 

We have tried various therapies and treatments, from "alternative" therapies to traditional western medical treatments, including Intrauterine Insemination (IUI).

In September 2012 we embraced a gluten-free diet, as gluten intolerance is closely tied to infertility. 

We've experienced the pain and frustration of two failed IUIs.

Until last November my husband and I kept our struggle to ourselves. We were completely unwilling to share our story, and to some extent we were unwilling to accept our diagnosis.

National Infertility Awareness Week:
This week on my blog, I will be dedicating the entire week to spreading awareness about infertility, offering encouragement for those battling the pain of barrenness, and providing resources for friends and family of those facing infertility. Topics will include:

Ideas for stepping up out of the pit of infertility and transforming negative emotions and energies into productive, worthwhile activities.

Collaborative efforts from women currently battling infertility, and how they overcame common lies women believe about being barren.

Online and print resources for those battling infertility as well as those who want to come alongside and encourage and support their infertile friends and family members.

How to encourage and support your infertile friends.

Owning your infertility + embracing the waiting period.

Collaborative efforts from women who have made it through to the other side of infertility straight to the hearts of those currently navigating the muddy waters of barrenness.

Infertility from the husband's perspective.

There will also be a giveaway during the week with items I've hand-picked to offer hope and encouragement to those battling infertility. My goal is to offer encouragement and inspiration not only to those currently facing the isolation and frustration of infertility, but for those who wonder how they can minister to their friends who are facing infertility.

I hope you'll join us, and help spread awareness about infertility. It is an isolating journey, but it doesn't have to be.

You can connect with me at my website, on twitter, facebook, and instagram. I'm also on pinterest and google. However you decide to connect with me, please take time to introduce yourself!

to my iPhone photographer

(skinnies: Old Navy, shirt: thrifted, sweater: H & M, boots: Payless, necklace: Lisa Leonard Designs)

Since December this wall has been a constant background for my outfit pictures. It's located right outside the door from my classroom and is hidden enough that I don't have to pose like a fool while parents pick up their kids after school.

Although occasionally we are caught and I get a little red-faced as someone stares.

I'd also like to give a little shout-out to my fellow teacher and friend, Jess, who faithfully takes 30-40 pictures of me most days after the buses have left. Some days it's been snowing and freezing cold, other days it's super windy and rainy. But whatever the weather, Jess braves the elements with me to take some completely frivilous and unnecessary pictures of myself.

To her I am very grateful.

The wall's appearance started during basketball season in late December and has continued even though that blasted season is over (praise the Lord). Before Jess started taking my pictures there was this constant struggle to only wear my favorite outfits on days I was not going to the gym so I could get pictures done when I got home. And there were days I used my outfit as an excuse to not go to the gym. 

Jess has taken away that excuse. So thanks, I guess...

As the school year draws to a close---less than two months!---I think I'll miss this wall and our quick chats after school. Half the pictures she takes are of me talking because we're always having a conversation about something and I feel the need to stop smiling to share my two-cents.

But on the positive side, I've started a nice collection of blooper photos to entertain you with soon. And there are some really good ones.

five for friday

(follow along on Instagram @themarygraham)

1. We started our spring break off right with donuts and my favorite rummage sale. Guys, I need to go back to school so I stop spending money. Being home all day is dangerous.

2. Last weekend I got to hang out with some girls I graduated high school with. Some of those girls I've known since I was five years old--that's just some craziness right there. I haven't written a post about that night yet, but it's coming. It's a good feeling to have people in your life that just know you even though you haven't seen them in years.

3. My little baby, Harper Kimery, turns two on Sunday. I've been getting weepy all week about this. TWO.YEARS.OLD.

4. I've been reading Wheat Belly by William Davis while on break---he's anti-wheat and gluten so as I'm typing this, I'm finishing my first day of being wheat free. And I have the most horrible headache from it. Seriously, I can hardly see straight. Apparently, I eat a lot of wheat...

5. First day of spring break=six inches of snow. I'm over it, even if I get to drink hot chocolate with peppermint marshmallows. Still not worth it.

Have a great weekend, friends!
I hope your Easter is wonderful, relaxing, and filled with thanksgiving.
I'm going to be MIA for most of next week as I soak in my last week of vacation--be back soon!
Mary

Linking up with Lauren at From My Grey Desk Blog for High Five for Friday!

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There's still time to enter the Mommy and Me Easter Giveaway--get a little something for yourself and your kids!

dressed by social media.

(leggings: Vera Wang for Kohls, socks: no idea, blouse: Old Navy, jacket: {really old} Old Navy, purse: Instagram sale via Julie, boots: Payless, scarf: H&M)

The nice thing about not growing up in a Facebook/Twitter/Instagram world is that as an adult, I have a little more sense when I share things.

I know that seems ridiculous in a way because here you are reading my blog, all about me, where I share lots of me-related things.

But I try to follow the 25% rule. You see about one-fourth of my life on this blog. That rule has evolved and changed as I figured out who I wanted to be and what I wanted to share. And I'm happy with 25% here.

I think you get a pretty good glimpse at my/our life without me/us feeling exposed. And I still leave parts of our life out so that when we're around friends or family, there's still things to talk about. But then again, I don't ever really run out of things to talk about. (also see: blogging, mary)

That was a really long intro for me to tell you that my Instagram followers helped me put this outfit together. And that I really appreciated the help.

Weird transition, huh?

I posted this picture on Instagram a while back and asked for outfit ideas. Every time I put them on, they just looked stupid. I needed fresh eyes.

And it was amazing! I got a couple options, one I could do immediately (see above pictures) and another one I want to try, but I need a big, cozy sweater to do it.

And that is why I love social media.

But I'm still glad it wasn't around when I was growing up. Because, seriously, I was so stupid.

And I can't imagine what I would have posted on these here interwebs. 

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I would personally like to thank social media for introducing Tricia from Mama Marchand's Nest to me. I love this girl, her spirit and her thrifting! I love following her story on Instagram and Twitter and I think she's someone you should follow too. Go check her out!

used-clothing boutique

On Saturday, it happened.

After six months of collecting clothes, money, and supplies, we set up our used-clothing boutique for under priveleged teens at a local community center.

Through generous donations of clothes and/or money from our friends and loved ones, we were able to bless over 30 girls and send them home with a trash bag full of clothes, gift bag of cosmetics, and bellies full of pizza and desserts.

It was exhausting and trying and the devil is good at interferring when you're trying to serve God, but we survived and hopefully were able to show them a glimpse of God's love for them. 

Imagining those girls at school today wearing their new clothes and feeling good about themselves makes my heart happy.  And, I bet, God's too.

(This idea came from Erin at Living in Yellow and her project through The Shine Project.)

(P.S. Extra credit if you can spot any clothes I've previously worn on the blog...)

please use your indoor voice.

(pants: Lauren Conrad for Kohls, booties: Vera Wang for Kohls, blouse: Old Navy, blazer: thrifted {Liz Claiborne}, necklace: Rue 21)

Sometimes even when you're overbooked and stressed and haven't been sleeping because there's just not time, it's easy to turn down invites to see friends.

I'm famous for always saying let's hang out and then never following through.

It's just a skill, I guess.

So when my friend Krissy sent me a calendar appointment invite, I knew she meant business.  The girl who used to pass me notes in middle school was now sending me fancy dinner invites from the calendar on her iPhone. 

This was serious.

I accepted and we had an elegant dinner at a local diner (aka: we had burgers at Steak-n-Shake) and then thrifted at a nearby Salvation Army until they closed.  And at closing time, because they don't have an intercom, they just kept shouting the time until closing at us (TEN MINUTES!) even though we were the only people in the store, and someone could have just walked over and told us in his/her indoor voice.

But I digress.

We got to spend a leisurely evening talking and eating, we didn't have to cut up anyone's food or take anyone potty.  We got to try on clothes in the aisle of the thrift store without a complaining kid or a lost blankie.  It's amazing what five years time will make you appreciate: a hamburger and a smelly used clothes.

And just because the universe was so happy that Krissy and Mary were back together again, we scored some major stuff---that above blazer being one of the items. 

Lesson learned: make more time for friends, hamburgers, and thrift stores. 

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Check me out at Pink on the Cheek today--she's got a great giveaway going on so come and say hi!

Linking up with The Pleated Poppy, Real Girl Glam, Transatlantic Blonde, and Rolled Up Pretty.

five for friday

1. Last Friday night we attended our friends' Jeremy and Renae's wedding.  You know when you go to a wedding and you're like "why did they wait fourteen years to do this?"--that was this wedding.

2. Look how far my friend Brittany has made it since launching her Purpose Project on the first---you guys, go donate some money and help buy women out of prostitution.  It will be the easiest thing you do all day.

3. Did you miss the first two parts of my series on money?  It's changing the way we live and I think you'd like it to.  Like it in a "this is hard but worth it" way.

4. Don't you love it when an idea comes together?? Clothes drive, setting up shop, blessing those with less, serving others, these are things that are in the works with my beautiful Kristen and I.  It's overwhelming to see God work and decide to make you a part of it.  I can't wait to share more with you soon.

5.  And I'm ending on a sad note: our dog escaped from our yard last night and has yet to be found.  He's little and black so searching at night was pointless.  I was up most of the night calling places, filling out lost dog forms online, and screaming his name into the night.  It sounds dramatic and it was.  He was my first baby before there were babies and he's Harper's best friend.  He's been missing since 6:30 last night and it's consuming me. So let's hope he shows up today or I imagine it being a pretty low weekend at the Graham house.

Great way to end the post, huh?  Hope your weekend it shaping up to be better than mine~
Mary


Joining High Five for Friday with From My Grey Desk blog.

five for friday

1. Halloween: well, that was fun.  And I can happily say that we ran out of candy again this year.  I always think we got too much and then always run out.  I would share cute costume pictures if I had them, but mostly what I have is crying kids or fuzzy, blinking parents.  So I'm sharing those. 

Ellie was Curious George and Harper was The Man with the Yellow Hat but she refused to wear the hat.  Something to do with her mother accidentally snapping her face with the rubber band that held it on.  It was quite tragic.

2.  My co-workers and I paid tribute to a fellow teacher's mustache on Wednesday.  Everyone loves a good 'stache, right?  Well, I got the red one (go figure) and suddenly turned into the Lorax from the Dr. Seuss book. 

That one's going to haunt you for a while, huh?  Me too.

3.  Since it's Friday and no one's going to get any work done anyway, why don't you head on over to check out my friend Brittany's blog.  She's got this crazy goal of raising $1600 to buy four women out of bondage.  And when she reaches her goal, she's fulfilling her dream of dying her hair hot pink.  I can't wait to see what God does through this project and through Brittany.  And see her hot pink hair, of course. 

4.  Tonight Chris and I are heading to our friends' Jeremy and Renae's wedding.  Can I just tell you how excited I am?  Dressing up, being with friends, no kids, watching two people who have dated for fourteen years get married, and watching my cute husband do a reading are all things that are making this Friday just a little bit sweeter.

5.  Did you guys catch my giveaway from yesterday?  I'm honored to have you here and thought I'd show the love by giving away some sweet prizes.  So get in on that since you deserve it!

Have a great weekend guys and be blessed.

Linking up with High Five for Friday with From My Grey Desk.

five for friday

1. After an unseasonably warm week, the cool fall air is back.  I'm not going to lie, those 80 degree days were nice and I got to squeeze in one last wear of a couple summer dresses.  But I'm also thankful for cooler temps---it's against my religion to trick-or-treat in a t-shirt so it better be chilly next week!

2.  Did you catch this face earlier in the week?  It's the perfect mid-day pick-me-up and if you haven't seen what eating a marker does to your mouth, you should definitely check it out.  Oh, you know what eating a marker does to your mouth?  Well, check it out anyway.

3.  I'd missed Parenthood the past couple weeks and spent last night playing catch up.  And that is why my face is puffy this morning, so much crying!  Do you watch Parenthood?  You need to if you don't, it's just so perfect.  Also, I cried a lot when Julia had the work/family crisis and quit her job to get her priorities straight.  That is so my life right now.

4.  This week's posts were full of internet friends that became real life friends.  Did you see Tiffany, Brittany, and Carly?  Because I feel like you'd want to be friends with them too.  And Brittay wrote this crazy post about meeting me at Influence Conference that might give you a glimpse of real-life Mary if you want to check it out.  (Disclaimer: I am not as bad a driver as Brittany says. Well, mostly not.)

5.  I went kicking and screaming into the world of iPhones last week.  And while it was bittersweet to leave my beloved Blackberry, I did get to finally be cool and sign up for Instagram so if you need one more feed of random kid pictures, some outfits shots, and, apparently, lots of pictures of my husband, follow along with me at themarygraham.

Hope your weekend is blissfully wonderful and involves lots of sleeping.  Well, at least that's what I'm wishing for.
Linking up to Five for Friday with From My Grey Desk.

becoming real-life friends

I don't know what you heard, but I did not try to kill anyone the first day of The Influence Conference. 

And if you hear different from anyone, they're lying.

I think I might have been half-asleep or drugged, but I offered, via The Influence Conference facebook page, to pick up some people that needed a ride from the airport to the hotel.  People I had never met before, didn't know anything about, and might not like.  It was a risky move, to say the least.

And you know what?  Some of the freaks I picked up happen to be my newest best friends.  Really.

I spend the morning shopping with this girl and then cleaning up a big puke mess in the van from Harper so that when I rolled up late to the airport, the first words out of my mouth were "sorry if my minivan smells like barf."  It obviously won them over because we were together the rest of the conference. 

I've always had a way with words, it's a gift.  A gift from God. (sarcasm)

I had no idea the relationships I would form while attending The Influence Conference.  True, real, important relationships.  And when it was over, it was a little like summer camp ending and not wanting to go home.  Who was going to chug large amounts of black tea with me?  Who was going to be completely inappropriate with me?  Who was going to braid my hair??

Okay, might have gone too far with that last one.  No one braided my hair.  But I'm sure if I had asked, Carly or Brittany would have been right there.

Can't wait until our road trip girls, see you soon.

make this: pizza pasta

I was blessed with two amazingly healthy pregnancies.  There was about a four week period during each where I seemed to do nothing but sleep, but other than that, there were no issues.  I never had morning sickness, never once threw up or even felt nauseous.  I was an annoyingly-content pregnant person, extra fat and happy.

My friend Kelley has not been so lucky.  She's had some rough pregnancies and she's currently on her fourth and bedridden.  Three kids under the age of six and she's stuck on the couch.  Truthfully, there are moments that this sounds enticing, but I know truly it's not fun and, actually, really hard.

A couple weeks ago, I put together a meal for her and her family, something that could be frozen and used later since I didn't know what other meals she'd be getting that day.  I had a lot of fun putting it together because it's something I wouldn't currently make for my family since I'm still working on losing weight...so I just got to make my house smell really good and then send it on its way. 

Pizza Pasta
3 cups pasta (any short cut pasta will work)
1 cup pasta sauce
1 cup pizza sauce
2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
1 1/2 cups diced pepperoni
1/2 small onion
1 green pepper
1 cup diced cherry tomatoes
1 1/2 cups diced sausage (I used turkey sausage, use whatever you like on your pizza)
2 T. minced garlic
olive oil
salt & pepper

Boil water for pasta and follow the directions on the box for preparation time.

Add 2-3 tablespoons olive oil to a large sauce pan.  Once hot, add pepperoni, sausage, onions, green peppers, minced garlic, tomatoes, salt & pepper, and anything else you'd normally enjoy on your pizza (mushrooms, olives, ham, etc.).  Cook until browned, about 6-8 minutes.

Layer cooked pasta into a dish.

Add the layer of cooked meats and veggies.

Mix pasta sauce and pizza sauce together then add that to the dish.  I added more pepper at this point.  If you're not making this for small children, you could also throw in some red pepper flakes.

Next add the cheese.

I added a couple bags of frozen broccoli, a box of garlic bread, and some fresh-baked berry muffins (dessert? breakfast? both?) and the meal was complete.  Normally, I'd serve this kind of meal with fresh fruits and veggies and probably skip the garlic bread altogether, but my philosophy is the more, the better when taking a meal to friends. 

And what's so great about this simple meal is that it's all cooked.  You can just heat it up in the oven until the cheese melts or put it in the freezer for a couple weeks until you need it.  It's so easy Kelley's husband could do it (just kidding, Mike).

After Harper was born, I completely understood the magic of a meal brought to your house.  It doesn't even have to be anything special or fancy (obviously), but it was so appreciated.  So who can you cook for tonight?